insurance jokes


Local Life-Insurance Salesman A Catalog Of Horrific Sudden-Death Scenarios

Courtesy of The Onion PLEASANT HILL, TN—Bob Carson, a State Farm life-insurance salesman for the past 27 years, is a walking encyclopedia of sudden-death scenarios, local sources reported Monday. Enlarge Image Local Life-Insurance Salesman A Catalog Of Horrific Sudden-Death Scenarios Carson, who sells life insurance to local residents. “Did I ever tell you about that […]

Real explanations of car accidents collected from insurance forms

The following are actual statements found on insurance forms where car drivers attempted to summarize the details of an accident in the fewest possible words. •Coming home I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don’t have. • The other car collided with mine without giving warning of its intention. • […]

CIA Director Quietly Buys Nuclear-Attack Insurance

BETHESDA, MD—According to sources at the Allstate Insurance Company, CIA Director Michael Hayden purchased nuclear-attack insurance Wednesday, paying a $100,000 monthly premium for his homes in suburban Washington, Pittsburgh, and near Cheyenne Mountain, CO. “It’s a typical nuclear policy that protects the insured from damages caused by fallout—pretty straightforward, though at that monthly rate, I […]